Are you single and looking? Are you ready for a real Soul Mate or Twin Flame relationship? Do you love the Tarot? If you answered yes to all three questions, this is the post for you! I’ll take you through the simple (I didn’t say easy!) steps, using your favourite tool to manifest your best relationship ever!
It’s a bold claim to make but I know it works because it worked for me. I finally met Mr Right at age 44 and I have worked through all the steps listed below myself. We recently got married and I have never been happier!
BE HAPPY IN YOUR OWN SKIN FIRST
Make sure you are happy in your own skin. A really good relationship starts with a happy and contented you. Use the Single and Happy Tarot Spread to lay a great foundation. Once you are happy in your own skin, it is so much easier to start expecting good things to come naturally into your life. You will find yourself a magnet for positive people and that is the kind of person you want to be with forever, right?
1. The Sun – You! Your vitality levels
2. Mercury – Your self-talk
3. Venus – Friendships
4. Mars – Opposition
5. Jupiter – Career opportunities/Good fortune
6. Saturn – Your obligations
7. Uranus – Unexpected future events
8. Neptune – Your dreams, goals and aspirations
9. Pluto – What is changing/needs to change
10. The Moon – Emotional challenge (stands between you and being 100% happy). This card, Pluto (change) and Mercury (self-talk) form the key to unlocking the missing ingredient for complete and total self-fulfilment.
WHO DO YOU SEE YOURSELF WITH?
Know what to look for in a partner – it may not be what you think! We all have a type but I promise you, if I had a penny for every time someone told me “He wasn’t really my type” about the guy they ended up marrying… Check what advice Spirit has for you in terms of the qualities you need to look out for in a long-term partner with the Future Soul Mate Lover Tarot Spread!
Before you start shuffling the cards you need to choose your significator cards. This spread is different because it requires two significators: one Court Card that you choose for yourself based on how you perceive your own personality and one Major Arcana Soul Card. (You will find out how to calculate the latter HERE.)
The reason for choosing two significators is that they carry different meanings. If the Court Card surfaces in the ‘love pile’ then you will be in a relationship with someone that you do not have a karmic/past life connection with. If the Major Arcana card surfaces first, then it will be with someone from your soul group. Whether or not this is someone you have already met in this lifetime is decided by the Ace (someone new) or 6 of Cups (someone you already know).
Now onto the spread! Shuffle the cards as usual, focusing on your future lover…
The next step is to turn the piles over and pick the pile with the highest ranking card. If there is a ‘tie,’ number-wise, the Elements decide and rank in order from low to high: Fire – Water – Air – Earth. Let’s say you find the 3 of Pentacles, the 6 of Swords and the 6 of Pentacles… The pile with the 6 of Pentacles is the one you would choose. In the picture below, you can see it is pretty straight forward which pile to go for since there is only one Major Arcana (or trump) card and they always outrank the number and court cards.
These three cards also give you a bit of a thematic mini reading of your future love story.
Once you have chosen the pile to read from, you search for one of the two significators you chose for yourself. Do make sure that you do not alter the order of the cards while looking through them – simply gently fan them out. If both significators are in the pile, it is only the first one that matters in terms of deciding if this will be a soul group lover or not. In the sample reading below, the Empress Soul Card has been located which indicates that the future lover of this seeker is indeed someone from her soul group.
If you do not find your significator in the pile, you are simply not meant to explore this topic further at this point in time. Wait a few weeks and try again.
Now you search for either the 6 or the Ace of Cups. Again, if you cannot find either of these two cards in the pile, you are not meant to read on your future love quite yet. How long you should wait until you try again is up to you, but I recommend waiting at least a couple of weeks. If both are in the pile, the same goes as for the significator card – only the first of them counts toward answering the question.
Remember, these two cards do not answer the question about a past life connection for the purpose of this spread (thesignificator card does). The Ace of Cups is a new lover and the 6 of Cups is someone you have already met… either an ex, someone in your friendship circle or possibly even a work colleague.
As for timing, the closer to the bottom of the pile, the sooner you will meet. Let’s say your Ace/6 of Cups is about 2/3 of the way through the pile, the timing is about 8 months.
In the sample reading below, the Ace of Cups showed up, so the seeker will meet someone who is new to her in this lifetime but whom she will have instant recognition with due to the soul group connection indicated by the Empress card earlier.
The next step is to separate out four cards on either side of the Ace/6 of Cups. If the card is close to the end of the pile, you simply ‘wrap around’ and pick cards from the bottom of the deck to make up for this. You will need a total of nine cards to conduct a reading.
Lay the nine cards out in the order they were found, in three rows with three cards each. You will read these cards intuitively. You already have a rough time frame and know if this will be someone old or new, so all the other cards give you extra information about the personality of your future lover and also about under what circumstances you might meet. Do pay attention to any Court Cards as they may give you a clue about your future lover’s Star Sign.
The method used for reading this 9 Square is the story spread method which is an intuitive way of reading the cards. There are no positional meanings and for the purpose of this spread all three rows represent the future. Look at the images and let your imagination guide you. The central theme is always either the Ace or the 6 of Cups. Surrounding cards will fill in the blanks. Write down what you see and don’t worry so much about traditional card meanings.
Deck used to illustrate the spread: The Victorian Romantic Tarot by Magic Realist Press
WHAT IS YOUR STRATEGY, PET?
Have a strategy for happy dating. While it would be wonderful if ‘The One’ just came knocking one day, we all know it usually doesn’t happen that way and we all have to venture into the dating jungle one way or another before settling down.
The trick is to have fun doing it. Let the Happy Kitteh Dating Tarot Spread guide you…
1. kitteh sez – Imagine you are a cat and think about how your playful kitty self would act in this dating scenario… Would you jump up on his lap an purr? Is he holding a piece of string out to tease you? Or is he perhaps the neighbourhood greyhound on the prowl for the next kitty to devour? Really look at the image through your kitty eyes… This card represents your gut feeling about the potential of this relationship – and kitteh’s gut feeling is never wrong.
2. kitteh no lyk – All cats like different things and they never pretend to like something they don’t just to please anyone. Is there something about this guy or dating scenario that does not meet your needs? Look at the card through eyes of kitteh evaluating a risky situation.
3. kitteh do lyk – Cats like what they like. Heck, they like cat ladies… and let’s face it, nobody else does. He may not be exceptionally good-looking, bright or brave but this is an aspect of the hu-man or relationship that really meets your needs and clicks into place. Look for the catnip!
4. kitteh do – Weighing the pros and cons of cards two and three, this is the action your kitteh self would be advised to take next. Mind you, kittehs aren’t very good at taking advice. That’s fine – just do what you like, on your terms and remember to be kind to your hu-man slave when he deserves it
…and check out these Top 10 Dating Survival Tips for the Highly Sensitive Person if you know that you might struggle a bit with the hustle and bustle of dating:
1. Expectations – Keep them low – I would even say non-existent – in terms of relationship potential. Don’t pin your future happiness on the other person and especially not before you you know them. See a date as an opportunity to get to know a new friend and to simply have a good time. Anything else should be seen as a bonus and greeted as a pleasant surprise.
2. Keep it real – Many HSP’s are prone to fantasy and daydreaming. Have a dating protocol and stick to it. No more than ten emails back and forth and then a phone call to make the voice connection. A first meet-up shortly after of the coffee date variety is highly recommended. It’s easy to get carried away on fluffy pink fantasy clouds with someone you have gotten to know online, only to have your dreams crushed by the other person showing up and not matching the fantasy at all in real life. Skype is free to download and an even better alternative than a phone call if you want to make sure the other person actually matches the person in the profile picture.
3. Stay safe – Never give out personal information until you know the other person is reliable and who they say they are. As an HSP, in addition to the common sense basics of not giving out your address etc, you should always allow your intuition to guide you about how much you personal information you share. Do you tell them where you work or train? Only if you don’t mind them showing up at your workplace or gym!
4. Avoid alcohol – Make sure the first date (or meet-up) is just a coffee (or herbal tea) date. You need your finely tuned intuitive powers to stay finely tuned during the precarious process of getting to know a new person. Yes, alcohol takes the edge off any nerves but it also interferes with your intuition.
5. Avoid coffee – Intake of caffeinated beverages before a date will make you anxious and jittery. If you are extremely sensitive to caffeine, you should avoid it on the actual date too. Stick to soothing herbal teas.
6. Meet in public – Meet in a public place that you feel familiar with. You will find it easier to stay grounded and centred if you are in well-known and comfortable surroundings.
7. Have an escape – Arrange with a friend to give you an ’emergency phone call’ about 15-20 minutes into the date, which you can choose to ignore if you feel comfortable with your date.
8. Know your remedies – Carry haematite or red jasper to stay grounded and tiger’s eye for confidence/SP chakra protection. Rose quartz promotes unconditional self-love. Bach rescue remedy in tablet form is great to carry with you too (especially if you didn’t Skype with them first and they look nothing like their profile picture). Lavender essential oil can calm your nerves before a date. Check your breathing. Just breathing deeply will make you feel better instantly if your breath has gone shallow due to the butterflies in your stomach.
9. Go dutch – Paying for your half of the bill will prevent you from feeling obligated. Whether you like the other person or not, it’s always good to go home and ponder things for a while after the first date. If you are asked out on a proper date after the initial meet-up, it’s OK to let him pay (or do whatever you are comfortable with).
10. Take it slow – Don’t let him drop you off at yours on the first date even if he is polite and offers. That can wait until a few dates down the line. He will understand if you explain and politely bow out. If not, it just proves that you made the right decision to not let him take you home.
BONUS TIP: Have fun!!!
And yes, there is an actual Internet Dating Vetting Tarot Spread you can use to check a guy’s intentions out before your first date!
BRING YOUR INNER WITCH OUT TO PLAY
Sprinkle your plan with some Tarot Magick. Magick is all about turning the odds in your favour and we could all do with a little extra luck – The great news is that you can make your own dating luck. It’s called Magick and if you’ve never used the Tarot cards for spell casting before, now is the time to give it a whirl!
Holistic Love Tarot Spell
If you wonder what tarot love magick has to do with holistic tarot, you need to understand that holism addresses the wellbeing of a person based on their whole life situation and to many of us, relationships are one of the major sources of the kind of stress that causes energetic misalignment and dis-ease. The tarot is the tool par excellence for creating energetic alignment and restoring balance and harmony to relationships – including the relationship with Self.
Choose three tarot cards from the tarot deck of your choice. (Cards below selected from the Lovers’ Tarot by Jane Lyle) Each of the three cards represent qualities that you wish for in a mate.
Choose the first card from the Major Arcana to represent the spiritual quality you most desire in your beloved. I have chosen The World (Saturn), as the spiritual quality I most admire in a person is striving to overcome self-imposed limitations. By the way, if you look closely at the Favicon to the left of the URL of the blog, you will see that I have chosen a portion of The World card from the Visconti Sforza tarot deck.
The second card is chosen from the Court Cards. This represents the kind of personality traits that turn you own. I have chosen the visionary King of Wands (Fire of Fire/Sagittarius), someone who has the ability to inspire others and isn’t afraid to lead the way.
The third card represents a way of relating to others that you admire and would like to see in your beloved. This card is chosen among the Minor Arcana cards. I have chosen the Ace of Cups as it promises both self-sufficiency, in the sense of having connected with their own source of joy within, as well as an abundance of love to share with others.
Now here’s the holistic twist to this love spell: These qualities are what you need to bring into your own energy field and integrate with your other qualities so that you can create an energetic resonance with the kind of partner you seek.
Prepare as you normally would for spell casting. A minimum is to ground, centre and ask Spirit for protection. A Friday (ruled by Venus) on a waxing or full moon would be a good time to perform this spell. If you work with scents, candles and crystals to strengthen the intent, I recommend Rose essential oil, a pink candle and rose quartz or rhodochrosite.
Start with the Major Arcana card. Hold it in your hands in front of you. Focus on the image and your intent to integrate this spiritual quality. Breathe in this quality through your nose while gazing at the card and breathe out through your mouth with the intent your breath to connecting you fully to the energy of the card you have chosen. Repeat the full cycle of breath six more times. Allow your breath to return to normal for a minute while you continue to softly gaze at the card. Visualize the image and the desired quality moving into and radiating out from your heart chakra.
Do the same with the other two cards. When working with the Court Card, you need to focus on one or two personality traits that you most desire and associate with that particular courtier.
Place the cards (or photo copies of them) in a place where you can see them daily. Take a couple of deep breaths to fix the energies of these cards in your heart every time you are reminded of them and give thanks that you are about meet the man or woman of your dreams. The more you affirm to yourself that you now possess the qualities symbolised by these cards byacting as if they are apart of you, the quicker you will begin to attract people who resonate with these energies.
Now when you meet the One, you will know that you meet because there is resonance and harmony between you rather than a need for you to be together in order to feel complete.
“Healthy relationships are based on the passion and excitement of sharing the journey into becoming a whole person.” – Shakti Gawain
Angelic Love Spell
If you have a spare Tarot card that represents the kind of love you wish for, you may want to include this in the letter.
For instance, you may wish for a soul mate relationship with someone that you have shared past lives with. In this case, include the 6 of Cups.
For true love in general, choose The Lovers or the 2 of Cups.
For the polyamorous among you, a better choice would be the 3 of Cups and if you are looking to settle down with someone, go for the 4 of Wands or the 10 of Cups.
A princess dreaming of her Knight in Shining Armour would opt for the Knight of Cups. Just make sure that it’s actually the one you wished for before you say ‘I do,’ so you won’t have to wake up to a reality of spending the rest of your life with some twat in tin foil.
The main thing is that you need to go for the card that best symbolises your dream of true love.
The letter should be written by candle light. Invoke your Guardian Angel and the Angels of love when lighting the candle.
Use nice stationary and your favourite pen. Pour your heart out to the angels and don’t forget to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’
You may want to address your own guardian angel or the Archangel of Love & Romance, Chamuel, whose name means ‘Eyes of God’ and who can help us find our true match. If you had a bad break-up with someone and you wish for them to return, you may wish to address Archangel Raguel who is able to restore relationship harmony.
When you have completed your love spell, seal it carefully with an ‘Amen, so mote it be!’ and place it somewhere safe until your wish has come true.
Know that your angels are busy doing the work for you but also know that you won’t meet anyone if you hole yourself up. Socialise, go out and make an effort to meet new people!
IF IT AIN’T BROKE, DON’T FIX IT!
Got your guy/girl? Great – Leave them cards alone! Don’t read on every little thing in a new relationship. Be in the moment instead and allow things to unfold organically.
The problem with frequent Love Tarot Readings about the same relationship is that they put the focus on things that have not really happened yet and may or may not manifest for the very reason that you keep worrying/reading about them. Just relax and enjoy, and if you can’t, know that you need to work on relaxation rather than on using the cards for self-soothing. The latter usually just exacerbates the worries since it is difficult to detach emotionally enough to read about a new relationship.
Naturally, if things start going askew, don’t hesitate to consult the cards… or better yet, get a professional reading!
Blessings,
~ Lisa